New Norm and New Normal: Bengaluru Muslim couple decides books library as partial meher
The new couple decided to create a small library at their home.
We often hear about meher customs in Muslim marriage. Meher customs consist of gold, silver, money, or other resources. However, this new couple established a new norm in the new normal. The groom gifted a books library to the bride. The bride had requested to have a library consisting of books from 10 different domains.
Fareen and Sufyan got engaged in August, and the demand for books was kept. Sufyan, a 27- year-old PhD scholar, has decided to make a books library by the wedding day.
“It’s about time that we look at meher in a new light. It is the right given to the bride in Islam, and she can put in a reasonable request for anything, even a books library. I am fortunate as my future partner took it positively and have started creating one,” said Fareen, a corporate employee and the would-be bride.
The couple decided to establish this library in their home. “I was happy to hear the expectation for a library at home. As we are a family of PhD students, the thought of a home library with new books excited us. Now, we will have books from diverse domains. I am looking forward to the new additions to the existing collection,” said Sufyan, the PhD scholar and the would-be groom.
Conventionally, the meher customs revolve around jewelry, money, and such possessions which the groom gives to the bride before marriage.
Fareen, a corporate manager, included books on gender, disability, public health, city, and biographies. Families on both sides came together to support this. “We encourage the importance of education in our family and community. We are happy that our kids are taking this non-conventional approach,” added Ibrahim, father of the bride.
This idea came after a bride from Kerala had put forth a similar demand for books as a part of meher during marriage. The Kerala couple had tried to overcome the obsession with gold and other possessions in the community.
